Swedish

I wish I could write this and say that I was fluent in Swedish and that I was only ever talking Swedish to everyone and that I have forgotten English because of it. I wish that was the case.
I have learnt so many things on this exchange, just one of those things has not been how to speak Swedish.
Today I had a speaking Swedish test with one of the scariest teachers I have ever in counted in both New Zealand and in Sweden. Now first up I am not very good at speaking Swedish and when you add this teacher to the mix, well let’s just say that my Swedish goes out the window! So this was all going to be a very interesting! I went badly.
What is one of the most frustrating things about Swedish is that I can understand for the most part what everyone is saying but when it comes to actual words coming from my mouth I get insanely stuck and very scared that what I am planning on saying or how I am say it is going to be all wrong and I get all wimpy and chicken out! I know that it is stupid and I really should be more confident in speaking and making a right idiot out of myself as half the time I am never going to be seeing these people ever again but some part of my brain doesn’t seem to work like that. It runs away, rather than go `yes I am here and look I will now speak Swedish to you!´

I guess I thought it would be easier than it has been for me to learn this language. It is my first second language and now I am wishing I had taken French back when I stated high school! Oh well at least I am giving this a try!

Also I think it would help if the Swedes weren’t better at English than me in the first place!!